i have a crumby keyboard

(i think there is a pun in there somewhere, but i am not even going to try. i have been told lately that my delivery on jokes, funny stories, etc. sucks, though it always sounds good in my head. i wish i were as good of a storyteller as kaka. but really, i don't care if people don't like my stories. maybe that will be the litmus test in my future significant other--finding a woman who enjoys my stories and thinks i am funny even though i am really not.
like yesterday at work, people were telling their flight horror stories and i interjected about the time [this is in the jetset days] when i was flying from frankfurt to portland for a quic trip fr my grandparents' 60th wedding anniversary and a woman died on the plane [she was in first class--what a waste of an expensive ticket] so we had to land in reykyavik (sp?), iceland to, um, deboard her. so technically, i have been to iceland which i just thought was kind of random and funny [though also not funny since a lady died]. but the story just didn't go over so well, and i don't think it was because of the whole death thing. maybe it's just not funny.
if you have ever watched the bad cable station TBS, they have these ads now of people calling into their 'funny center' or something like that to verify how funny something is.
maybe i need to do this too. or maybe the delivery sucks.
but really, i don't think i should care. i think it is an important life skill to be able entertain yourself.)

anyway, back to the title of this posting, this is due to the fact that i am eating a cookie. i am having one of those anxiety attacks that comes on for no particular reason. i have the day off, so maybe i am feeling like i don't know what to do with myself, hence the anxiety. i've been doing errands, not really for me, but for other members of the household. i had to pick up something from the decorator (who you will recall decorator fritz clashed with) who, btw, was fired by the mutti, so it was AWKWARD as hell.

but i was having the for-no-apparent-reason anxiety attack before the confrontation with the decorator.

so then i went to this department store called von maur. when you walk in, it looks exactly like nordstrom. even though i like nordstrom, i hate sales people who pressure you. so i walk into this store and no one says anything to me, not even in the shoe department, which is notorious for go getters. still, i had prepared myself for the attack, thus further increasing the anxiety level.
i went to the trendy men's department, which i don't really shop in, because really, i don't need a pair of jeans with the union jack sewn accross the entire @$$. but something i always notice in these trendy somewhat retro look t-shirts trying to look like they're from other countries--it's always italy, spain, brazil, or ireland. you never see one of those t-shirts that has "norway" or "latvia" or "kazakstan" printed on it. what is the obsession with these four countries? let's branch out a little bit, people.

so, what to do. i think i will take a nap.

part of the deal is that i am lonely i think, increasingly. i really miss my friends a lot. A LOT.

but i did book my flight to germany day before yesterday, so i will be reporting to you from there between 25 september and 9 october.

it's what i am holding onto right now.